I’ll get straight to the nitty gritty. In your marriage has the spark gone? Are you growing in parallel silos or unevenly or in different directions? Not talking anymore or only about the kids and home chores? Are you missing the affection, intimacy and thrill? Are you feeling bored, unappreciated or even taken for granted? Are you looking enviously at other relationships? Are you having the same fights and never fully resolving disagreements or disappointments? You don’t want to leave and still love each other, but you are wondering how things might be if you did leave? Are you feeling un-resourced and don’t know where to go for support? Maybe you are at the point of wishing for a miracle?
At the coal face of marriage, beyond theContinue Reading
Kidz on the Coast (Dec/Jan 2015)
When I interview couples for their weddings, and I ask about the importance of their family, this phrase is almost word for word repeated countless times, “my family is my world”.
I think this is even more true than we know….even for people who don’t have a great relationship with their extended family and may not be close or have them ‘in their world’.
Families not only prepare you for the world and life, I believe the amount of diversity, conflict, complexity, triumph, challenge and richness of interactions you experience and learn from in the microcosm of your family circle, is exactly what you will find on the macro-scale out in ‘the real world’. It is inescapable.
Whatever the quality of relationships you experience in your family of origin, there will be an unnerving degree of pattern repetition and replay happening inContinue Reading
Death is a profound rite of passage that escapes no-one. Facing the end of life process – whether through illness or old age, disease or accident – can be made meaningful and bearable by creating the appropriate rituals and celebrations. End of life ceremonies to mark this final passage, and the people and relationships involved, are incredibly important.
The funeral is the most sacred and profound ceremony to conduct. It is the final authoring of one’s life. But often families are unprepared and unresourced. Even with an expected death, many families find the essential information they need to make decisions and feel empowered with choices, is not available to them.
It is not just the funeral though, how many of us have a plan for our dying? Given that most of usContinue Reading
At end of life, consider the difference my unique, bespoke and holistic funeral & pastoral care services can offer.
My craft as a funeral celebrant and pastoral care practitioner is unique, bespoke and holistic. It is hard to convey what I do, but I was humbled to receive this thank you from a family I worked with last week. They have generously allowed me to share their words to support the work I do in the hope others can be held appropriately at their time of need. Because I don’t work for the big funeral houses, my service survives only by word-of-mouth and community referral from those who have experienced the difference I can offer. It is a sensitive service I offer and hard for me to ‘advertise’ but please know I can be available to you or any family in need leading up to, during and after a death of a beloved. Thank you my lovely family for these generous words:
You’ve been onContinue Reading
Kidz on the Coast Article (Feb 2015)
I love the beginning of a new year. I love reviewing my progress, reassessing my dreams and desires and setting new goals. Yes, I am a New Years nerd, preferring the emerging light of a New Years Day sunrise over a NYE party. Give me an unknown horizon any day over the nostalgia of the past.
But sometimes my gaze can often be distracted, focussing too longingly into the future, so seduced by the fantastical of the yet to be realised and the energy of potent potential, that I can risk failing to grasp the reality and pleasure of today and the ‘right now’ moments. I have to remain vigilant and ground myself in the power of now, (to quote the famous Eckhart Tolle). He is right too! The only power weContinue Reading
Seniors on the Coast article (Jan 2015)
In both my private life, professional life and in the public realm, this week has been poignant with love and loss. Sometimes the rich tapestry of life delivers crescendos of peak experiences that can whirl you up in an eddy of emotions and land you….well…not in Kansas Toto!
With a combined career as both celebrant and pastoral care practitioner, life does tend to bring a disproportionate amount of both love filled joyful moments as well as sadness and loss across my path.
This week, though, it’s been a ‘four funerals and a wedding’ week. Like the famous movie, only in reverse, and much less swearing…well maybe only just a bit less. Unlike the movie though, there is no tidy happy ending, rather life goes on with tough news and challenging momentsContinue Reading
Gosford City Magazine article (Jan 2015)
It is officially Summer. School is done. Holidays are here. Yay!!! The weather is great…..I hope…and you are busy with Christmas and New Year’s celebrations, and sharing holiday fun with family and friends. And I really hope all your wishes come true.
But at some point in the silly season, I get overwhelmed by it all and crave the return of normalcy. And I know for many, while family is great, maybe only in small doses.
After a while, I secretly want to get back to work and for the kids to be back at school. I become agitated by too much relaxing and socialising and long for the return to routine and my ‘alone time’ and ‘creative space’. And you know what? That is entirely OK and natural too! I don’tContinue Reading